


Castiel Milton's Five-Step Guide to Breaking Hearts

by queen_of_hells_bells



Series: The Five-Step Guide [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: A little bit of fluff, AU, Angst, Broken Hearts, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Teacher!Dean, bookstore, cas is a dick, really - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-27
Updated: 2014-05-27
Packaged: 2018-01-26 20:01:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1700741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queen_of_hells_bells/pseuds/queen_of_hells_bells
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A prequel/sequel to Dean Winchester's five-step guide to something or other. You'd think I'd know since I wrote it, but I don't. Go figure. A gift for my favorite commenter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Castiel Milton's Five-Step Guide to Breaking Hearts

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MirkatManor](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MirkatManor/gifts).



Step one: meet a great guy.

And make sure he’s way too good for you: beautiful, smart, cooks, owns a nice home, and has an _actual_ job with a steady paycheck. It anything was clear, it was that Dean Winchester was way above Cas’ paygrade.

They’d met when Dean brought his niece into the bookstore that Cas owned, looking for books on dinosaurs. The little girl, Lili, had taken an immediate shine to Cas, grabbing his hand and dragging him around the aisles, taking the long way round to the dinosaur section, her overly attractive uncle trailing behind and apologizing every twenty steps. The two had left the small store with two books and a promise to return next week.

Cas didn’t get a date with Dean until four visits and a slightly embarrassing conversation later-- _”Well, your daughter-” “Daughter?” “Yes, Lili-” “No! Oh, Cas, no. Lili...she’s my niece. My little brother, Sammy, she’s...she’s his.” “...oh.” “Yeah…”_ \--but it seemed like it was going to be totally worth it.

Step two: hold out on him.

Cas wasn’t a prude, whatever Gabriel and Balthazar might say, but he certainly wasn’t going to put out on the first date. Ever. As far as he could tell, it never worked out well. Just look at his parents: one date and they wound up with Gabriel. No, first date Cas only even went as far as a hug. Dean Winchester was no exception.

Well, maybe the hug lingered a bit longer than it needed to, and maybe Cas had never wanted to take someone upstairs on the first date before. So maybe Dean was a bit different. Not that it mattered, because it ended with a (lingering) hug and a promise to call.

He only held out until the third date, but it was totally worth it. After all, he was really only in it for the sex, wasn’t he?

Step three: led him on.

There was no doubt about the fact that Cas and Dean were dating. Dean would stop by the shop whenever he could, sometimes just a five minute stop to bring lunch and a kiss, sometimes his entire lunch break would be spent in a leather armchair, reading a book and chatting whenever Cas was free. Dean would also take him out every Saturday, rain or shine, always someplace interesting. They’d gone to the zoo, the movies, the park, the middle of the woods, on a picnic; sometimes they would just settle on Dean’s couch and order take-out, watch a movie, and snuggle. It was really great.

There was only one problem: Cas didn’t date. Ever. It just wasn’t something he did anymore. He didn’t fall in love, he didn’t get attached, he certainly didn’t snuggle. He was getting freaked out, waiting for the other shoe to drop, hoping that Dean would break it off before Cas had the chance to ruin everything.

And yet, when Dean asked him to move in, he agreed without a second thought.

Step four: fall in love.

If there was anything Cas really didn’t do, it was fall in love. It was as much a surprise to him as it was to Dean when the words slipped out. Dean, however, had accepted the information readily, immediately reciprocating the statement. It was Cas who freaked, trying to avoid the subject as much as possible.

Falling in love was dangerous, the name itself says so. Fall. _Fall_ in love. It implies an ending, a danger at the end of the flight. Something bad. Falling in love with Dean would only end badly, for him, not for Cas, and because of that, Cas had to stop this.

Step five: run away.

As per usual, he picked the best and worst possible time to break up with Dean. It was a Saturday, Cas was sleeping in, barely awake when Dean pushed open the bedroom door. Pancakes. Chocolate chip pancakes, powdered sugar, butter, and maple syrup. They were Cas’ weakness, and no that Dean was handing them to him, he was stuck in bed with the person he...he loved.

“Hey babe.” Dean parked the tray on Cas’ lap, settling down next to him and pressing a kiss to his lips. “I was thinking we could go for a picnic later, maybe the movies.”

Shoving a bite of pancake into his mouth, Cas moaned happily, nodding. “Mm-kay.”

Dean chuckled. “‘Mm-kay’ what? Picnic or movies?” Cas shrugged, smiling. “God, you’re such a dork. Oh, hold on, you’ve got some-” Dean’s tongue poked between his lips in concentration as he attempted to pull something off Cas’ lips. “Eh, whatever. It’s cute.”

The two fell into a companionable silence as Cas worked on his pancakes, Dean fidgeting nervously beside him. Finally, Cas laid down his utensils and turned to his--his what? Boyfriend? “What? Go on, just say it.”

“But you’re not-”

“Yes, I know, but if you keep fidgeting like that, they’ll end up on the floor instead of in my stomach. So.” He folded his hands, looking at Dean expectantly.

Dean looked back at him, biting a lip in concentration, or was it nervousness? Suddenly Cas had a very bad feeling about today.

“Um, Cas. Ok. We’ve known each other about a year...year and a half now.” A year, 7 months, 15 days, but who’s counting? “And I know that...well, it’s not been very long, but-”

“Dean,” Cas was beginning to catch the drift of this conversation, and he had to stop it. It would only go downhill from here. Somehow, someway, he would break Dean, and he just couldn’t do that. “Dean…”

“Yeah, Cas, I know, but please just let me get it out, ok? Anyway, I know it hasn’t been very long, but I love you and you love me, and I was wondering, if, Castiel Milton, if you would marry me.” Somewhere during his speech, a small silver band had appeared, a green gemstone inlaid in it. It was beautiful, and must have cost the schoolteacher a pretty penny. Cas’ shock must have shown on his face, because Dean rushed to keep talking. “It’s just, I can’t honestly imagine my life without you, because everything now is Cas-this, or Cas-that. I walk around measuring my days in terms of when I get to see you again, and I just-”

“Dean!” Well. _That_ was unexpected. Now he had to say something, because Dean was looking at him with those big green eyes confused and loving and vaguely...frightened? And Cas wanted to say ‘yes’, wanted to marry this man, but all that came out was “Are you insane?” The fear disappeared, his eyes clouding over with confusion, but Cas could only push on. “A year and a half? Are you serious? No! Dean, no! You don’t even _know_ me.” A little bit of anger was beginning to break the cloud of confusion. _Good. Better for him to hate me_. Before Dean could respond, Cas buried himself in the hole he’d been digging. “Dean, you clearly don’t know me at all. It could been five years, it could be _ten_ , and I would _still_ say no, ok? Just...just no.”

“Cas-”

“Yeah, I know, you ‘love me’. Well, news flash Dean-”

“Don’t. The rest of that might have been true, but don’t outright lie to me.” Oh, Cas had forgotten about Dean’s hatred of being lied to. Swallowing harshly, he drew himself up to his full height--when had he stood up?--and spoke.

“Dean, I don’t love you. I never have.”

The silence in the room thundered, infecting every space. practically breaking Cas’ eardrums. The two of them just stared at each other; they’d always been good at that.

Dean’s silence was, to Cas, astounding. The Dean he’d known would have asked once more, maybe said his name, maybe even pleaded with him. This Dean, however, was dry-eyed. Silent.

Finally, the green-eyed statue nodded. “If that’s how you feel, then I think you should leave. You can come back for you things tomorrow. I’ll be out between twelve and five,” Of course, Sunday brunch with Sam, Jess, and Lili. Cas would miss them, especially Lili. He doubted he’d ever see her again. “Maybe later. I’ll leave a key under the pot on the front porch. I expect that the door will be locked when I return.” Quick, prefunctory, as though speaking to a delivery man. Cas nodded once, knowing that he had no right to be hurt by Dean’s words.

“It will be. Bye Dean.”

“Goodbye Castiel.”

His last look at Dean was of the man sitting on their-- _his_ \--bed, legs scrunched up as he leaned his head on the headboard, one hand clasped tightly shut, a nearly-empty plate of pancakes sitting beside him. His eyes were closed.

Castiel barely made it out of the apartment before he was dialing his phone. “Gabriel? It’s me...I fucked up.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Didja like it?


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